well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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