Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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