he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize