I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
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That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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