a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize