Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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