moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Less talking, more tequila
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
