We named our party play list daddy issues
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
