Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
