what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
