I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
im holly from the hills drunk
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
