i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize