First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
