just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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