why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
