Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
