You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
