Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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