well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
