you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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