At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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