i already hear my dad disowning me
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
