Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
