This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize