so that wasnt chicken after all
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
