i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
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