Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
are you so shy because you have an std?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
