Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
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