i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
organizing the empties. That sober.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
