i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize