Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
