mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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