He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
You blew him?!?!
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.