bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
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