so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize