his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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