I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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