You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
