I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
