I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
