Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
i out mim tonsoeep
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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