So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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