I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
