I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize