our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
