We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
