went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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