Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
