yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you win again, gameday.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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