What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
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