this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize