Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize